Sotto Voce 4/4

Title; Sotto voce
author; Azzy
pairring; Nick/Ellis
Fandom; L4D2
Rating; M/T+
WIP; 4/4
Warnings; blood, angst, craziness, language
summary; Sacrifice comes in many shapes and forms.
AN; Okay so it didn’t turn out to be a longer thing. But atleast it has an ending now *smiles* And for those who don’t get the Banoi refferal, click here.

Chapter 4 – Of course it stings a bit.

But keep your eyes on the road and put blinders on
You know you have to keep going now
Wake up to a new day
A dark, but white day
Make a choice

Don’t wait even a second
Don’t sleep even an hour
Don’t have doubts, just do it

-Siri Nielsen.

Chapter 4 – Of course it stings a bit.

No one had been more surprised than Ellis when Nick didn’t push him away, but grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. As the kiss ended Ellis didn’t move, he just rested his forehead against Nick’s.

”What the hell was that for?” Nick whispered.

Ellis sighed but didn’t answer, he had no answer to give. How could he tell Nick about the deal he had made with God on his way here? Ellis was sure that the older man would laugh at him anyway.

Nick grinned, ”All bets are off i suppose.”

Ellis sat back on his heels, and stared at Nick. He had not expected that answer. ”Yeah I suppose.” He agreed slowly. ”Lets get you to the wheelchair.” Ellis said with a little smile, trying to size up Nick, figuring out how to carry him best.

Nick nodded, watching Ellis as he stood up and strapped the AK, Swinging it around so it was resting against his stomach. Kneeling down with his back to Nick, ”Let’s go.”

Nick wrapped his arms around Ellis’ neck and winched as Ellis fought to get to his feet with the extra weight. ”This is stupid.” Nick growled, not knowing what else to say.

”Not at all.” Ellis panted as he slowly, very slowly made his way out the alley. ”We’re gonna be fine.”

Amazingly they made it to the wheelchair without rousing attention from any zombies, Ellis let himself fall backwards with Nick, landing himself on Nick’s lap in the wheelchair. ”Dear lord.” He panted, ”You’re heavy.”

Nick still held on to Ellis for dear life, even if he once more was seated. ”I promise to diet if we get out of here alive.” He chuckled out of breath.

”I will hold you to that one.” Ellis answered with badly hidden sarcasm, knowing they both were skin and bones from eating nothing but canned food, and spending most their time running from death. ”You can let go now.” Ellis whispered.

Nick slowly let go of his death grip around Ellis’ neck. ”Sorry.” He mumbled.

Ellis stood and handed Nick the AK, he kept the handgun himself, just for safety. ”Okay we don’t have a whole lot of ammo, and you gotta chose what to shoot, okay?”

”Dude,” Nick grinned as he weighed the AK in his hands, ”I never thought i got to ride shotgun.” He looked up at Ellis with a little smile, ”Technically it’s not a shotgun, but who cares?”

Ellis shook his head amused and walked around the wheelchair and took a firm grip of the handles. ”Here we go.” He sighed before he put all his might into pushing the wheelchair. The metal screeched in protest as the wheels were set into motion again.

Nick held the AK so tight he thought he might break it, and Ellis ran for dear life, panting, gasping for breath. They knew that if they stopped they’d be dead, a larger group of zombies had gathered in pursuit of them, but lucky for them they were some slow fuckers.

Nick was beginning to think they might make it to the bridge over the river. He could see the tower coming closer in the horizon, it wouldn’t be long before they were there. He was greatly concerned by the pained wheezing he could hear behind him as Ellis ran far longer and faster than he was capable of, and he did feel slightly guilty for putting them in this situation at all.

They turned a corner only to find the street packed with zombies. ”Shit.” Nick groaned, lifting the rifle. In the distance he could tell there was a shape that acted differently from the other aimless zombies, and then he heard the growl. He aimed at the hunter hoping he could even aim as Ellis shook the entire wheelchair.

Ellis saw the hunter too, he would call out to Nick to kill it, but found he had no air to find his voice. So instead he just focused on running and hoped he wouldn’t pass out before they made it to a safe room.

Nick shot and missed. He shot again and missed again. ”Bitch!” He growled, and aimed again, but this time the hunter was too close and even if he tried to get it as it jumped, and the full horror of it didn’t hit him before he heard Ellis scream behind him. ”Get it off, get it off, get it off! Getitoffgetitoff!”

Nick grid his teeth and tried to turn the wheelchair but the wheels were too tight for him to turn with his tired arms. So with a giant effort he turned in his seat, rewarding him with a very awkward position and a even more awkward aim at the hunter on top of Ellis. He took the shot none the less, The hunter yelped but didn’t let go of it’s prey. Nick shot again, and this time the hunter let go of Ellis to see what the hell was causing it pain. It turned to Nick and sneered, flashing rows of sharp yellow teeth.

Nick pulled the trigger, but the rifle just clicked, out of bullets. ”Go figure.” Nick groaned, and instead tossed the AK at the hunter.

Ellis got to his feet behind them, winching in pain, getting out the handgun and with a shaky hand pulled the trigger, taking out the hunter just inches from Nick. Wordlessly Ellis got to his feet, looking over his shoulder at the incoming horde, and then limped over to the wheelchair, handing Nick the gun, and Nick just took it without a word. Ellis leaned in and whispered in Nick’s ear.”Don’t give up yet.”


They had fought a feverish, crazy fight to get over that bridge, only good thing about that wheelchair was that they could hold much more ammo and bombs than they could carry. There had been moments where Nick had been sure they would die, like when the wheelchair tilted and he fell down into a crack in the bridge. Or when those big fucking tank things threw concrete after them. And as Ellis had carried him aboard the chopper, Nick did something he had not done in years, he wept. He wrapped his arms around Ellis and cried so hard his entire body shook. And maybe Ellis had wanted to cry too, but he didn’t, he would just hold Nick and let him cry. Nick cried for his lost life, he cried for all the things he had wanted to do but never got around to, but he also cried happy tears of the shock of still being alive. He had not even dared think that he would survive.

Ellis let him go for a moment and went over to the medikit on the floor of the chopper, he looked through it and found what he needed, he screwed the lid off a glass with pills and handed one to Nick. ”Here, that will make you feel better.” He said softly.

Nick took it with a shaking hand, and swallowed it dutifully. Just two months ago he would never ever had eaten anything some grease monkey had handed him, and even less a pill. But he trusted Ellis with his life, why not trust him with meds?


Ellis watched as Nick fell asleep, he followed as the chopper landed and Nick was carried out, but that was when his journey ended, he was not allowed to go with Nick inside. Ellis had to be tested for the Green Flu and any mutation of it before he was let inside. IT made sense, but still he was sad to see the doors close and he lost sight of Nick.


Pain was what woke Nick, he groaned in discomfort, and then as the pain intensified he whimpered, opening his eyes. Last he remembered he was in the helicopter with Ellis, with a sting of regret he recalled bawling like a baby, most undignified. It took a while before he registered where the pain came from, it was his right leg that hurt like someone had set it on fire, Blinking he tried to make sense of his surroundings. White and sterile, so he could only assume he was at a hospital or somewhere that had that function. Pain shot up his side as he moved ever so slightly, causing him to scream even if he didn’t want to.

The scream alerted a nurse who came through the glass door with a professional smile on her lips. ”Good morning Nicholas.” She said, ”Finally decided to wake, did you?”

Nick was baffled, what the hell was she talking about, he ran a hand over his chin, finding not stubbles but an actual beard under his fingers. ”How..” He croaked out with a hoarse voice.

”You’ve been out cold in two months.” She said, meddling with a syringe. When she noticed the slightly panic stricken expression on Nick’s face she just smiled, ”Don’t worry this is just a mild painkiller.”

Nick had no choice than to believe her,


He had been on the verge of sleep again as the door had opened again. Nick blinked, staring at Ellis that looked very different in a pair of jeans and a too big shirt. Something was off, and then he realised that his companion didn’t wear a hat, he had never seen Ellis without that stupid hat.

”Nick.” Ellis sighed happily, ”How are you?” He asked carefully as he slowly sat down next to the hospital bed.

”Where are we?” Nick asked, knowing that it was not related to the question at all.

”You’re never gonna believe this.” Ellis laughed, ”But they evacuated everyone as far away from the coast of the US as they could think of.” He paused, ”We’re at the island of Banoi. Other than that i don’t know where the hell we’re at,” Ellis smiled, ”It got jungle and everything, Oh Nick.” He took Nicks hand, ”I can’t wait to show you this place once you’re up and running.” Nick looked beaten. And Ellis knew why, so he just continued, ”The doctor told me that you hadn’t damaged your spine, you fractured your hip badly, On the plus side it means that you’ll walk again, on the down side… ” He paused again, searching for the right words, feeling Nick’s hold on his hand growing painfully hard. ”You’ll have a stiff leg because they had to use all sorts of metal to repair the bone.”

Nick didn’t really know what to do with that information at all. So he just let out a breath he had been holding, releasing Ellis’ hand a little.

”Did you hear that? You’re gonna walk again!” Ellis grinned.

”With a cane, like a retard?” Nick just asked flatly.

”Yeah maybe. But we can get you a cool-ass cane!” Ellis admitted, and then boldly raised Nick’s hand to his lips, kissing it gently. ”I’m just so glad you’re gonna walk again, you scared me for a moment there.”

Nick looked at Ellis, searching his eyes for something he thought he had seen back there in the alley. He untangled his hand from Ellis, But instead of snatching it back, he caressed the younger man’s cheek, ”You saved me.” Nick whispered.

”That’s what friends are for.” Ellis just whispered breathlessly, as Nick’s fingers ghosted across his face.

”Does that deal of yours with God still apply?” Nick asked with a tiny smile.

”What do you mean?” Ellis asked confused.

Nick grabbed a hold of Ellis’ neck and pulled the man down till their noses touched. ”I was just wondering if you only kissed people when you made deals with your invisible friends.”

Ellis just smiled, ”I suppose i can make an exception.” When Nick didn’t answer, Ellis just turned his head slightly so their lips met. A kiss much less desperate than last, And a kiss they both were reluctant to end.

Nick started to laugh softly as Ellis blushed sightly. ”Well, at least that i didn’t damage that part.”

Ellis snickered too as Nick’s erection was clearly visible through the flimsy hospital cover. Ellis was just about to say something when the light went out with a sickening pop, He looked at Nick in the dark. ”It’s probably just a fusebox.” He said. But as screams emerged from the dark, the generator kicked in. Nick sucked in his breath as he saw the nurse that had given him the injection sprint past the open door in panic.

Nick looked at Ellis, and Ellis looked at Nick, and without a word Ellis got up to find something for Nick to use as a cane. He found a crutch in the cabinet in the corner, for a moment he just stood and stared at it, his back to Nick. ”Yanno.” He said softly. ”Don’t give up, we’ll make it, we just have to.” He turned around and smiled a tired smile at Nick. ”Are you with me?”

Nick fought to slide out of bed and rest his feet on the floor. ”Like Siamese twins.” Nick answered, holding out his hand for the crutch.

They both knew the likelihood of them both surviving this was very low, but at least they knew where they had each other, realising that trust was more crucial than any other weapon.

-The End.


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