Dreams made of glass 10/52

Photobucket
Title: Sound
Genre: drama
Characters: Seth, Izzy, Bastian, Terry & Nando
Prompt: 37
Rating: pg
Type: series
Summary: Seth has visitors, and Bastian is acting up.
Warnings: adult situations, language
AN: I’m spoiling icysilverpill today.. ahaha Seriously then the hard part for me is the pictures, it takes me an entire evening to get them right, a chapter like this takes about 1½ to 2 hours to write, edit, and update, i am first and foremost a writer, not a simmer. i just happen to think the crossover is tons of fun. This chapter might leave you a little confused, but i promise it will all be explained. This is written for simfic50. Oh yeah, forgot to say, by sound i of course refer to the sound of a voice. Dammit for only having the hard promts left.

Alice in her party dressed to kill
She the thanks you turns away
She needs you like she needs needs her pills
To tell her that the worlds okay
To promise her a definition
Tell her where the rain will fall
Tell her where the sun shines bright
And tell her she can have it all
Today

The safest way the straight and narrow
No confusion no surprise

-Sisters of Mercy

Photobucket
Terry had been let out on parole on a Monday, he had gone straight to see Seth, slowly picking up on everyday life again. making sure that Seth took his medicine, making sure that they had food in the fridge. It felt good and right, to take care of Seth like that, and truth was that Seth needed someone to care for him, just as much as Terrence needed someone to take care of.

And slowly they created their own little screwed up family unit. or at least that is what they both felt.In the void that Kane had left, Seth and Terrence had found they could use each other to dull their sorrow, never did they speak of Kane and what had happened, careful not to shake the frail truce they had.

________________________________________________

Photobucket
Terrence had eventually realised that he would have to face Izzy, Seth had been on the phone with him daily and visited him twice in a week at the gallery. But none the less he had volunteered to do the last grocery shopping as he knew Izzy, and his lover would come for dinner. Seth had been real nervous too, he had to eat twice the amount of tranquillizers that day otherwise he would scratch his arms to a bloody mess.

Izzy arrived as Terrence had gone to the store, Seth let him in with a hug and a smile. “Welcome” He said, guiding Izzy to the living room.

Izzy sat down and looked around on the walls, “I figured i would come first, i wanted to have a chance to have you to myself a little” he said, looking away from the disturbing wall art and back to his son. “I understood that Terrence lives with you now?”

“Yeah” Seth said with a smile “He had no where to go, and i figured that he was in prison because of me to begin with, so i would be a jerk if i didn’t give him a room and a mattress”

Photobucket
“He shot Simon because of you?” Izzy asked, realising that he sounded like the Spanish inquisition, “I’m sorry.. you don’t have to answer that, it’s just… i knew these guys really well once, and..”

Seth shrugged. “It’s fine, Izzy, it really is” Somehow he couldn’t get himself to call Izzy for dad or papa, it seemed wrong, nothing about Izzy screamed ‘parent’ to begin with, more like a posh ice queen really. “Ma.. I mean Isabel she hooked up with Simon when i was a little boy”

Izzy nodded but didn’t ask more questions, just letting Seth talk, after all that was why he had come. to listen to Seth.

“See this scar?” Seth pointed to his lip, “Simon gave me that, plus several others you can’t see, i have broken more bones that i thought i had, some more than once, the doctors at C.T told me that some of my ribs have been broken several times, the entire front of my teeth is plastic.. yeah he did a real good job at parenting”  the last words he spat out acidly.

“That is beyond terrible” Izzy whispered, shocked.

“That’s why Terry shot him” Seth stated.

Photobucket
“I understand that” Izzy said softly “I mean, i would never condone vigilante behaviour like that, but i can understand why he would want to.. eh.. do something” Izzy bit his lip, “I’m sorry you had to endure that, son”

Seth smiled, that was the first time Izzy had used that word ‘son’ naturally in a sentence.

“Simon.. eh, did he ever do anything besides.. eh” Izzy searched for the words, but there was no polite way to ask your own son if he was molested by your childhood friend.

“No” Seth shook his head, knowing what the stuttered words meant, “He just beat the living shit out of me, hells if i know if he went into the bedroom to Isabel afterwards, i was seldom aware of anything until hours later, i was busy hiding”

Izzy let out a relieved sigh none the less.

“What did i do to ask for such punishments, you might ask yourself” Seth said a little harshly, “I was your son, and then I fell in love with a boy”

Photobucket
“The same boy was accused of killing, Terry’s son, Kane.” Seth said, a dark shadow passed over his face.

Izzy looked down at his hands on the table surface. “I read about those killings in Murky Mile” He smiled embarrassed, “I checked your records”

“You fucking checked up on me?” Seth said, startled. Not sure what to think about that.

Izzy gave Seth a pleading look. “I just wanted to get to know you a little” Raking a hand through his hair, Izzy sighed. “Oh i suck at this daddy business, don’t I?” Reaching out and grabbing a hold of Seth’s hand, Izzy took a deep breath “I never said i passed judgement upon you, i just read it. And as far as i know they never proved it was you, and even if it was, i would still be proud to be your father” he gave Seth a half smile.

“Proud?” Seth whispered, “What is there to be proud of?”

Photobucket
“After all this, what you just told me, and what i read in your records, you are still standing, that is one hell of an accomplishment, you should give yourself a little credit Seth” Izzy said, smiling lovingly at his son.

Seth sat and looked down into the table for some time, thinking about what Izzy had said. “Ma-maybe you’re right” he finally admitted.

“Of course i am right, sweetie” Izzy said smiling motherly. “You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for, and maybe its just time for you to allow yourself to be happy, instead of ‘this'” Izzy swung a hand as a gesture at the walls in the room.

Seth nodded slowly “Every time i felt close to thinking i might be a little bit okay, i just feel so guilty, i can’t Izzy, i just can’t. Maybe in time, but not yet” Izzy looked confused and worried, but remained silent. “I was the one with the stupid idea to leave Murky Mile in Florian’s neighbour’s car, and i was the one who promised him we would.. we would have a life, and i was the one who told him i loved him forever.. I.. I just feel like i am erasing a little part of him each time i smile, i don’t know if you understand, but it was my stupid idea’s fault that he is dead, so in that manner, yes, i killed him. and i am not done with atoning, i wonder if i ever will be!”

Izzy took a deep breath. “you are not the first to mourn lost loved ones” he said in a near whisper. “But punishing yourself and keeping yourself from fulfilling your life, does not bring that boy back to life, Seth”

Photobucket
“I know” Seth muttered, biting a nail. “But i can’t help but to feel that i was the one that was supposed to lay dead on the floor of that cabin, not Kane, he did  not deserve that, he was a bright kid, and had a long life in front of him.. its just not fair”

“You have a long life ahead of you too” Izzy said gently “Don’t waste it with ‘whatifs’ and guilt, believe me.” When Seth didn’t say anything, Izzy continued. “Look at us, i would rather enjoy having a son now, than i would want to spend my time hating Isabel, for what she stole from us”

Seth nodded, “You’re right.. but..”

Then the doorbell rang, and Seth almost felt sorry that he had to get up from the table. how he wished that he had known his dad years earlier, maybe things would have been different, maybe he had been able to put some sense into his head back then.
________________________________________________

Photobucket
The other guests and Terrence had made it home, and while Seth was busy with cooking, Terrence finally worked up the balls to smile at Izzy, trying his hardest to be casual. “Israel, good to see you” He mumbled, reaching out his hand to greet his old friend and one time lover.

“Terrence!” Izzy cheered merrily. “Its unbelievably good to see you” he took Terry’s hand and shook it friendly.

Terrence couldn’t help but to think that Izzy still had a warm, firm handshake. “It’s been too long” Terrence admitted with a smile.

“Yeah” Izzy said with a smile, “26 Years”

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
“I am going crazy Terry! knowing you sleep next to her at night, knowing you make love with her.. we have none of those things, and i want it! i want you as she does!”

“I can’t Izzy” he finally whispered, looking everywhere else than on me. “She’s having that baby, and.. I can’t leave her”  I tried to fight the tears, but no matter how hard i tried to will them away, they just started to slide down my cheeks, my chest felt tight, and i heard my own heartbroken sob. I had promised myself i wouldn’t cry. that i could deal with whatever answer he would give me. Terry wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight, just making everything worse. I could have dealt with his anger much better than his pity. “I love you Izzy, don’t run out on me when we’re almost there”

I didn’t know what to say, all words just got caught in my throat, and i felt terribly exposed after my suddenly outburst of feelings, not to mention i couldn’t stop crying, making Terry’s sweater wet. “You don’t mean that” I whispered, “This is just fun and games to you, and.. i can’t do it any more”

“We can make love too” He whispered, his breath hot on my skin. How i had longed to hear him say that, now it  just felt wrong, like i had forced him to say them. But my heart skipped a beat none the less. I pulled back a little to look straight into Terry’s eyes, looking for any shadow of deception, and found none. “You’re not lying?” i asked, feeling stupid, standing there with my heart on my sleeve. Falling for it like a fool when he kissed me, it was the sweetest kiss i have ever shared with anyone.

Photobucket
“Oh, come here” Izzy purred, pulling Terrence in for a hug. “Thank you for taking care of him” He whispered in Terry’s ear.

“But of course” Terry whispered back, “He is your son, and was my son’s best friend”

“I’m sorry to hear about your family” Izzy whispered sadly.

“Thank you” Terrence whispered back, when he really thought ‘it was just all for nothing’ “I missed you Izzy” standing there in an embrace with Izzy felt like a timewarp, like they were still sixteen, standing in Mrs. Singer’s kitchen.

“I missed you too, Terry” Izzy admitted with a little boyish snicker. “Nobody else wants to listen to my ABBA albums”

Terrence laughed loud and merrily, pulling away from Izzy he still clucked with laughter. “It’s because you are an old fart, Mr. Singer”

“Is not!” Izzy stated childish. “ABBA is timeless!”

Terrence rolled his eyes, “you wish”

Photobucket
Bastian walked to the kitchen, looking at the food and the cook. “So you’re Seth, huh?”

Seth looked up from the food and smiled at, what he presumed was his step-dad. “I am, and you are Sebastian, right?”

Bastian nodded, “That’s me”

Seth smiled and returned to stirring the sauce, “So, you and Izzy has been together for long?” he asked, not knowing what to say. Trying to make pleasant conversation.

“Twenty years, this year” Bastian said, smiling.

“Wow” Seth whistled in appreciation. “That’s great”

“I was beginning to think i was the only one tho thought that counted for something, any more” Bastian said venomously. placing a hand on Seth’s shoulder Bastian sighed “Listen, kid, its not you. You just have really rotten timing”

“Oh” Seth sucked in his breath, hearing Izzy’s laughter cut through the house, like was it mocking the sombre walls.

Photobucket
Izzy grabbed Nando’s arm, hauling him from the chair where he had been seated since they arrived. “Meet Nans” He said, “Better secretary and friend is hard to find” Izzy smiled lovingly at Nando. “Nans, meet Terry, he is the only thing that kept me sane up on that mountain with the other yahoo’s when we were kids”

Nando looked straight into Terrence’s deep dark eyes and felt his pulse rise, “Since when were you ever sane Izzy?” Nando said with a little timid smile. not looking away from Terry for a second.

Photobucket
Izzy chuckled and left them to go check up on the food. Nando suddenly realised he was staring, and blushed, looking away embarrassed. “Sorry that was rude of me” He said with a little timid smile.

“It’s not rude to stare, if you see something you like” Terry said with a nervous tick, biting a nail. Where he had the nerves from to even say something like that, he didn’t know. Nans just looked like the kind of person who could take it, besides then Terry had never seen anyone that pretty, and it would be a shame not to acknowledge that. Everything within Terry tried to make him look away from Nando’s grey eyes, but he didn’t with sheer willpower he kept the eye contact.

“Are you flirting with me, Terry?” Nando said, his smile widened, and his blush intensified.

“What if i was?” Terry said, waiting for the stinging slap across his face.

“Then i would say you were a brave man” Nando said cheerfully, but his eyes darkened.

Photobucket
“Hey there gorgeous” Izzy grinned, stepping in to the kitchen, seeing his lover standing over the food. “How’s it coming along? I am starving” stepping closer he rested a hand on Bastian’s hip. “We might end up buying something on the way home, huh?” he snickered, kissing Bastian’s cheek.

“Actually i think we should leave, right now” Bastian said softly, his words meant only for Izzy.

Izzy laughed, “Don’t be silly, sweetie. Seth bought all this food and prepared it for us, the least we can do is stick around and eat it, even if it turns out a midnight meal”

“I’m serious” Bastian whispered, “I saw his medicine cabinet when i was at the bathroom, and that boy gets more medicine than Jeffry Dahmer’s mother, there is something very wrong with him Izzy.. I know you want to believe all this, and you are a goodhearted man, that is one of the many reasons why i love you. But i really think you should let this slide”

Photobucket
“You can’t be serious” Izzy said still smiling. but looking into Bastian’s serious eyes, Izzy sucked in his breath. “You have ‘got’ to be shitting me, Bastian”

Bastian just inched closer, staring into Izzy’s surprised eyes. “Israel, my love. Please listen to me” He whispered urgently. “Are you telling me i should just ignore that we are stuck here in this nightmare house with a mentally unstable kid and a convict, seriously, Izzy think about it for a moment”

Izzy brushed Bastian’s hand off his shoulder and looked up at him in disbelief “I can’t believe you said that! These people are my childhood friend, and my fucking ‘son’ Sebastian!”

“The son you didn’t know you had before three weeks ago” Bastian yelled hotheaded, “I have known you for twenty years! And suddenly i am the idiot?”

Photobucket
Izzy stared coldly at Bastian, “Don’t pick that fight with me, not now” He hissed, warning the other man. “please” He added in a more begging tone.

“We’re leaving” Sebastian growled, grabbing Izzy’s arm, trying to haul him out of the room, which might have been successful had it not been for Izzy looking up at the stairs from the first floor, seeing Seth standing there, looking at them with a pained expression.

Izzy forcefully pulled his arm out of Bastian’s grasp. “I am not going anywhere until i had dinner!” He sneered, pushing Bastian away. “You are free to leave if you want to”

Bastian’s jaw fell, his eyes narrowed. “fine!” he spat, pushing Izzy out of the way with his shoulder as he left the kitchen. walking to the living room, sticking his head in. “We’re leaving Nando”

Photobucket
Nando looked up at Bastian, “Is something wrong?” He asked.

“Yes, and we’re leaving Nando, get your ass out into the car” Bastian barked.

Nando frowned, “you can’t tell me what to do” he crossed his arms over his chest. “we’re not kids any more”

“I am your elder brother, and i am telling you to get out in the car, Now Fernando!” Bastian said cold and hard, snapping his fingers to empathise his point.

Nando paled, “That was uncalled for, Bastian” he said with tiny voice.

“What? like anyone believes that costume?” Bastian sneered, some lipstick and a padded bra don’t make you a woman, Nando. and nobody buys it” he reached in and grabbed Nando’s arm, pulling his younger brother close, and away from Terrence.

Photobucket
“Asshole” Nando yelled, pushing Bastian away from him. “You’re a fucking jerk!”

“You can yell at me in the car” Bastian said grabbing Nando’s purse and jacket from the hook in the hall, tossing it in Nando’s arms.

“Fuck that!” Nando spat, “I’m taking the god damn bus! No way i am getting into a car with you” Nando turned around, looking at Terry for the first time since Bastian barged in. “I’m sorry, take care Terry” he said sadly, and then turned, pushed past Bastian in the door, and slammed the front door as he left. Bastian followed in hot pursuit.

Seth came into the living room seeing Terry look out the window, hearing Nando and Bastian fight out in the street. Izzy came and stood in the door frame. “It’s not your fault Seth”

Seth nodded slowly, gently brushing past Izzy he mumbled, “I’m sure the food would have tasted like shit anyway” he muttered disappointed.

TBC

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s