Harvester of shadows 30/34

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author: azzy
warnings: language, adult issues.
rating: PG
characters: Nando & Izzy.
prompt: 110 – let go
AN: Finally! I managed to crawl out of my hole and get the last chapters done for this story. 🙂 I didn’t change the plot or the end, I just had to have another approach to it. ^_^ So this story is officially out of it’s hiatus. I might warn that the ending is rather Shakespearian, so if you don’t like that sort of ending, and likes to believe that all the characters rode off into the sunset. You better just pretend the story ended now. I am saying this because I have had a world of crap by readers in the past who did not like the endings that I did, so I find it only fair to warn for a unhappy end – Read at own risk ^_^

// I was in your arms
Thinking I belonged there
I figured it made sense
Building me a fence
Building me a home
Thinking I’d be strong there
But I was a fool
Playing by the rules

The gods may throw a dice
Their minds as cold as ice
And someone way down here
Loses someone dear.//

-Abba

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“I’m so glad you came.” Nando said with a little smile, as Izzy sat down next to him at the empty bar. “I wasn’t sure you could find it.”

“Sure.” Izzy grinned, “I might be a mountain boy, but I know how to read a city map.”

Nando took a deep breath, “What do you think?” He gestured out into the room.

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“What I think?” Izzy said confused, “Eh.. it’s a coffee shop with a guitar and cheap art.”

Nando frowned, “We put a lot of effort into it.”

“We?” Izzy asked, not sure he wanted the answer. “This place is yours?”

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“Sorta.” Nando said, biting his lip. “Shit, Izzy, there is just no cool way of telling you this… But.. I sorta met this guy.” A little smile graced his lips. “Michael. And..”

“Let me guess.” Izzy said flatly, “He’s the one?”

“I think he might be.” Nando admitted, “At least he is… there.”

“Oh.” Izzy breathed, not pointing out that Nando had kissed him less than four hours ago, and here he was proclaiming he had found the knight on the white horse. “Congratulations are in place I suppose.” he said softly, bitterly.

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“Michael is a good guy, Izzy. He’s the corporate masseuse, and at this picnic we had some wine.. and.. long story,” Nando blushed demurely. “I really, really like this one. Don’t fuck it up for me, okay?”

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Izzy just sat stunned for a moment, “You’re dumping me for Mike the masseuse?”

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Nando sucked in his breath, “I am not dumping you, to dump you would mean we had something to begin with. Which we don’t. You were the one to make damn sure of that, remember?” He sneered.

Izzy looked down at the wooden desk, counting the ores in it. “I.. I didn’t mean it like that.” He whispered.

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“Could have fooled me.” Nando said acidly.

“It’s the truth!” Izzy said, his voice still tiny, but he looked up at the man beside him. “It was as I told you, I was just scared. Don’t you think I ever get freaked out?”

“I know what you are afraid of,” Nando said harshly, “You are afraid of getting old. That’s all, you are scared to death by the prospect of looking at a wrinkled face in the mirror, loosing your hair, and that your body will be less attractive, isn’t that it, Izzy?”

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“I..” Izzy was at loss for words once more as Nando spilled his venom unto him. “Maybe..” he finally said, his voice uncertain and shaken.

“You lied to me, you damn well knew that I had a crush on you. And the second you saw your chance you acted on it, crushing Terrence’s heart in the process, I wouldn’t put it past you to have done the same to your own son, if you had met Ferris out on town, or maybe you already have?”

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“Do you really think so little of me?” Izzy asked muddled, shocked to his core.

“Yes I do.” Nando said sternly. Hoping that Izzy would believe his lie, and leave, leave and never come back because this was just too much, it was so hard to sit here and accuse Izzy for anything he could come up with. All he wanted to to was to wrap his arms around the older man, and change that hurt in his eyes to a smile.

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“W-what did I ever do to..” Izzy asked with a low, sad voice, “You used to trust me..”

“I was a kid, Izzy.” Nando spat, “I’m sure my Freudian therapist will have a field day over this when I tell her, I had anal sex with my father figure.”

“Gods.. do you have to put it like that?” Izzy wrinkled his nose in disgust. “Makes me into a monster.”

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“A predator.” Nando said, clenching his jaw as he saw Izzy’s pupils dilate, and his lip quiver from the hateful words, “That is what you are Israel Singer.”

“I’m not!” Izzy argued, appalled.

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“And what jury would believe that?” Nando said, his voice amazingly still steady.

“What?!” Izzy turned his head and stared directly at Nando. “Please Fernando, you don’t mean that.”

“I could if I wanted to, and you know it.” Nando said, “But you’re right, I won’t. All I want you to do is return to where you came from, and stay the fuck away from me and my brother for ever.”

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Izzy said nothing he just took a deep breath and nodded as to agree with himself on the situations absurdity. When Nando suddenly reached out and grabbed Izzy’s hand caressing it gently. “You taught me an important life lesson, I should thank you for that.”

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Izzy’s expression stuck in a mockery of a smile, knowing that if he didn’t smile, he would cry. He pulled his hand out from under Nando’s swiftly. “Don’t fucking touch me.” he growled, smile still in place.

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“Jesus, for a moment ago you thought we were gonna knock boots, and now I can’t touch your hand.” Nando huffed feigning offence.

“Well,” Izzy said with a tiny voice, “That was before you told me was nothing short of a path..” Izzy was cut off as his cell phone rang, he pulled it out and looked at the caller ID, it came from his own home. Puzzled, he flipped the phone open. “Yes?”

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*Daddy?*

“Seth?” Izzy asked puzzled, not remembering when Seth had last called him daddy, if he ever had. “Is everything alright?”

*Daddy? She won’t stop. Make her stop, please.. tell her to stop FUCKING WHISPERING!* Seth fumbled with the receiver his breath was short and panicked.  little whimpers sounded almost like he was crying, or most of all trying to cry.

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“Seth! Calm down.” Izzy frowned, ignoring Nando as he went about turning on the lights in the cafe. “Listen carefully son, do you remember if you took your medicine, today, yesterday, a week?”

*I don’t know* Seth whimpered, *I don’t remember.*

“I think there is still some pills left in the medicine cabinet of yours. Why don’t you go look, just take the phone with you.” Izzy said softly.

Seth rustled with the phone, and then suddenly whispered with a panic stricken tone, *I can’t get there, she won’t let me.. Daddy? where are you? please you have to come.* Seth sobbed lightly, *She’s here to kill me, oh God.. I’m next aren’t I?*

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Nando stood and listened to Izzy trying to make sense of Seth’s paranoid rubbish. He hated himself for having to tell Izzy all that shit, this was not his cafe, it was a friend of him that worked here, there was no Mike the masseuse, and most of all he was still in love with Izzy, but he just knew it would never ever work, and they would both be best off breaking off like this. He was not sure he could manage to look at Izzy ever again, knowing that he could have been his, even if just for a while.

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“Seth? Relax would you? No one is there besides you.” Izzy asked, regretting it the second he had said it.

*She has no face* Seth cried softly, his voice trembling. *JUST GET IT OVER WITH YOU BITCH, RIP ME APART LIKE YOU DID FUCKING KANE! I DARE YOU!* Seth screamed high pitched, frightened out of his mind.

“Hush..” Izzy said softly. “HUSH DAMMIT BOY!” He finally yelled when Seth didn’t listen and just rambled on about the faceless woman. “Listen to my voice Seth.. Where is Ferris?”

*Gone* Seth whispered.

“Gone?” Izzy repeated, “Gone where?”

*Don’t know* Seth said relaxing a little. *everything’s a haze.. I wish she would stop whispering so I could think straight*

“I am a three hour drive from home.” Izzy said reassuring, “I will come as fast as I can, and I will try and find Ferris.. And you son, you try and get into that bathroom, and find your pills okay? Promise me.”  

*But.. she..* Seth breathed, *I promise* he then said listlessly, worrying Izzy.

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The connection broke off, and Izzy immediately called up Ferris. He only got his voice mail. “Ferris, call me, it’s really important! Seth’s really .. eh… Ill.” He clapped his phone shut.

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Izzy looked at Nando with a mix between hurt and worry. “Take care Fernando.” He said flatly.

“You too.” Nando said, smiling vaguely. “Tell Seth.. that..”

“Sure.” Izzy said opening the door to the street without looking back, “I will as soon as he joins our stratosphere again.”

-TBC-

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