Harvester of shadows 26/34

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 Title: Black
Genre: drama
Characters: Consuela, Jarod, Early (kinda), Sailor, Nate, Ramon, Tay, Seth, Ferris, Crystal,  
Prompt: 135 – Black
Rating: M+
Type: Series
Summary: Early’s funeral is a lot of this, but any old funeral.
Warnings: language, adult situations
AN: There is only so much one can write that is semi-interesting at a funeral.

I know sometimes things may not always make sense to you right now
But hey, what daddy always tell you?
Straighten up little soldier
Stiffen up that upper lip
What you crying about?
You got me…

-Eminem

Loreena Mckennit – Greensleeves,  I think its the saddest song there is, it was one of my dad’s favorite songs to play, and I paid a dear sum of money to have them play it at his funeral, so i figured that art imitates reality, and of course Early should have it at his as well. I couldn’t find a version with lyrics that wasn’t downright terrible, so I took this version that i also like, and actually own on cd, its just real close to the original.

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“Would you sit down Ramon?” Consuela said in a hushed tone.

Ramon cast one last glance towards the big double doors to the street, and then nodded, sitting down next to his grandmother with a sigh, his gaze avoiding his fathers casket on the church floor.

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“I can’t believe you talked me into this.” Seth grumbled, “I hate funerals.”

“Name me one person who likes them.” Ferris said flatly, “Would you just shut up, and pretend you’re at least a little sad.”

Seth turned his head and looked at Ferris, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to..”

“Yeah right.” Ferris said, his tone clipped and annoyed.

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The ceremony ended, and Ramon let go of Jarod’s hand. He wasn’t sure who was comforting who by that physical link. Turning in his seat, he looked down in the back of the church, and a smile spread on his lips.

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He made it. Like he said he would.

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Ramon got up, to go down there, but felt someone grab his arm, he turned around and his smile widened. “Ferris. You came.”

Ferris smiled a little sad smile, “Of course, you asked me to, remember?”

“I wasn’t sure you’d make it.” Ramon admitted, and from the look in Ferris’ eyes, he knew exactly what Ramon meant. It was not like Consuela, Jarod and Crystal had been thrilled.

“Are you okay?” Ferris asked softly, placing a sympathetic hand on Ramon’s shoulder.

“No.” Ramon answered truthfully. “Not at all.”

“If there is anything you need, anything at all Ramon, call me.” Ferris said, knowing it was not much of a comfort, but it was about all he could offer. “That goes for your siblings too.”

“Thanks.” Ramon said with a little nod. “I will.”

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“Ferris.” Crystals’ voice cut through the air, making him turn around, letting Ramon go.

“Crystal.” Ferris said, glancing quickly at the kid next to her and smiled, not sure what to say, he wasn’t even sure which of the myriads of children Early and Crystal had, it was.

“Sailor, this is Ferris, a old friend of your fathers.” Crystal said.

Ferris noted she didn’t mention herself, but since when had they ever been friends? they had been competing, that was about what their relationship had been. “Sailor.” Ferris said with a smile, and then turned his attention to Crystal again. “How are you holding up?”

Crystal’s smile faltered, “I’ll manage.” She said. “Look Ferris, there is something I need to know.” Crystal stood up, “He was seeing someone, a man.” She couldn’t even say it without the hurt showing, “Was it you?”

Ferris frowned. “No.”

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“I found your phone number, Ferris.” Crystal whispered harshly.

“It’s true I gave him my number, and I know you have no reason to believe me.” He turned his head and looked directly at Crystal. “I swear, we just talked.”

“That would be a first.” Crystal huffed.

“Look Crystal, you and I might not have a whole lotta love between us, but I would never get involved with your children’s father.” Ferris shrugged. “And that is the truth.”

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Crystal stared at Ferris, not sure if she should believe him.

“I know he saw someone, but I haven’t met him.” Ferris admitted, and pulled Crystal in for an awkward embrace. “I’m so sorry Crystal, I wish it wasn’t like this. For what it’s worth, I never did anything to deliberately hurt you, I just loved him too.”

Crystal finally relaxed in Ferris’ arms. “I know you did. I’m sure he would have loved to have both of us.” A faint chuckle escaped Crystal’s lips.

Ferris smiled as well. “I’m sure you’re right.”

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“You’re as lost as me, huh?” Seth said to Constantine who had come to sit next to him.

“Ramon asked me to come.” Constantine said hushed.

Seth nodded, flexing his hands out of pure boredom. “You guys are pretty close huh?” He mumbled.

“Not really.” Constantine said, “I think he pities me.”

“Why would he pity you?” Seth asked in a whisper.

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“I might have let something slip that I shouldn’t have.” Constantine admitted, he smiled a little sadly, “I had had one too many drinks.”

Seth grinned, knowing exactly what it was Constantine was talking about, judging from his blush. smiling to himself he remembered Kane’s surprised expression as he had ended the surprise kiss, which had been their first. He knew he should say say something along the lines of ‘don’t drink, kids’, but he didn’t. “It happens.” He said in a motherly understanding tone. “If he was pissed at you, he wouldn’t have asked you here.”

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“Yeah, that is what I don’t really understand, we haven’t been talking for some time.” Constantine said, “And then he calls me up crying, asking me to come here.”

“Maybe he just missed you and didn’t know how to tell you.” Seth said, almost adding, ‘he is Early’s son after all’, but didn’t.

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Seth looked up, only to see Ramon standing beside the bench. Constantine stood up and smiled a little embarrassed, sad smile. “Hi,” He said.

“I’m glad you came.” Ramon said softly.

“I’m sorry about your dad.” Constantine said lamely.

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“Thank you.” Ramon whispered, “Look I know I should have called you earlier, but there was just so much shit going on. And..” He turned and looked at Consuela and Jarod who was staring at them. “There sorta still is.”

“Ramon.. I..” Constantine started, but his voice faltered and he forgot what he had wanted to say.

“I’m just glad you came.” Ramon said with a nod.

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“Any time,” Constantine said, looking over at Jarod and Consuela, halfway trying to figure out what they were saying from their body language alone. “You’re my friend.” He smiled at Ramon, “Again, I’m sorry for your loss… And..” He turned his head and looked straight at Ramon. His own words from that night rang in his head, lord knows he had meant them, but they just seemed so empty now. “I have to get home.” Constantine mumbled, turning around, smiling at Seth who was seated next to them as he did.

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“Wait!” Ramon’s voice echoed off the church walls and drowning out all hushed conversations.

Constantine couldn’t help but smile, but didn’t turn around, he just walked out of the church with long strides.

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“Wait!” Ramon yelled, pushing the heavy door up to the outsides. “Wait up for fucks sake, Constantine.”

Constantine stopped and slowly turned around. “What are you doing Ramon?” He asked, not even sure why those were the words leaving his lips, they didn’t make sense.

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“Are you angry with me?” Ramon asked bluntly.

“No.” Constantine said, a relieved smile surfacing on his lips. “Why would I be upset?”

“It’s just..” Ramon sighed. “Look I’m sorry about that.. that evening. I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

Constantine just stared at Ramon with disbelief, “Neither should I.” He shrugged in a lame attempt of seeming carefree.

“Did – did you mean it?” Ramon asked so softly that Constantine couldn’t help but feel really uncomfortable, he couldn’t lie to him, not when he used that innocent, fragile tone, and at his dad’s funeral of all places.

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“Guess I did,” Constantine admitted, nervously fidgeting his hands, not able to meet Ramon’s eyes.

For a long moment Ramon was silent. “Consuela and Jarod wants to send me away, they want my mum to send me off to a school far away from here, and that would mean that we can’t be friends any more.”

“Of course we can, friendship has nothing to do with distance.” Constantine said with a cautions smile.

“Well, that’s why I said what I said, it was actually not because I didn’t..”

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“Don’t.” Constantine said pouting. “You don’t have to say anything.. I was the one who fucked up, I should have kept my mouth shut.”

“Why aren’t you listening to what I say?” Ramon asked slightly annoyed, grabbing Constantine’s arm hard. “I didn’t let you down because I didn’t like you, or was upset, I let you down because I know they are sending me away.”

Constantine lifted his gaze to meet Ramon’s. He wanted to say something, but nothing came, he just stood there and opened and closed his mouth like a retard.

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Pushing away from Ramon, Constantine just stared at the other boy wide eyed. “What the hell was that for?” He asked, his voice a whisper. “Don’t ever do that again unless you mean it.”

“Who said i didn’t mean it?” Ramon said, a slightly hurt expressions creeping into his voice.

“Why would you?” Constantine said, knowing he was being childish, and feeling ridiculously close to tears, this was not how it was supposed to be! He had dreamed of kissing Ramon for the better side of a year, but he had never imagined it feel this wrong. Maybe it was beause he knew that Ramon didn’t really mean what he said, maybe it was all a cruel joke played on him. “I wish i had never told you i liked you!” Constantine growled, “I can’t be your friend, not anymore.” He could see that Ramon was about to speak, but he didn’t stay around to listen, instead he sprinted down the street, heading home in safety.
___________________

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“Consuela.” Ferris said, giving Early’s mother his hand in politeness. “My condolences.”

“Thank you Ferris.” She said, her eyes cold as ice as she studied the young man’s face. “I’m surprised to see you here.”

Ferris just smiled a fake, polite smile. “I’m sure you are.”

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“Did Ramon invite you?” Consuela asked staring at Ferris.

“He did.” Ferris said with  a nod.

Consuela looked suspicious. “He’s taken quite a liking to you, so I’m sending him far, far away from here, somewhere you can’t ruin him too.”

Ferris closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Early did what he did on his own accord, and so does Ramon, you can’t lock him up and hide him away, it didn’t work with Early, and it sure as shit won’t work with Ramon either.”

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“Angel was a troubled child.” Consuela said with a pained expression. “But that just makes it all the more important to catch Ramon before he too falls into madness.”

“I wonder what it is you call madness.” Ferris said drily.

TBC

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